Saree Not Saree: India 2013

It's funny how time and distance change you, the roads you take don't always lead you home.

Cricket Chaos

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Last night we decided to attend a cricket match. After a semester of slowly learning the rules of street cricket and watching IPL over Mr. Das’ shoulder, we thought we might as well experience this phenomena that makes Indians literally go crazy. We crammed five people into a small cab and started out across the city. Traveling at a snails pace through traffic, we arrived two hours later. Sweaty and sore, we stepped out into cricket chaos. From rainbow, mohawk wigs to Indian flags, everyone was decked out in HYD Sunriser’s gear.

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The excitement was infectious as we pushed to the entry gate. Cameras and cell phones were not allowed so we hid them strategically in our clothes. I truly felt as though I was smuggling drugs across the border as the woman felt me up, looking for god knows what. Once we were inside we headed to our nosebleed seats. In the penultimate row, we found five bleacher seats together and sat to enjoy the riveting sport of cricket. FALSE. Whether pertaining to the sport or experience, I have compiled a list of things wrong with cricket matches in general.

  1. You can only buy cups of soda and water. No bottles. (No matter how hard we tried to bribe the vendor)
  2. Every beverage is warm and when you ask for ice a dirty man hands you three melting ice cubes in his unwashed palm.
  3. The only available foods are bags of chips and frankies (Indian burritos).
  4. There is no alcohol even though the match is sponsored by Kingfisher.
  5. Everyone in the crowd appears to be on something–no one can be THAT excited about  cricket.
  6. The rules make no sense no matter how many Indians explain them to you.
  7. There is no shopping. Anywhere. I came prepared to drop major rupees on jerseys and other Sunriser’s gear, but no.
  8. The “bowlers” run so slow, its not surprising this game laster FIVE HOURS.
  9. Let me repeat, FIVE HOURS.
  10. There are cheerleaders who wear tiny outfits and dance the whole time. Side note: they are white and untalented, making this concept that much more confusing for all parties.
  11. The men who came around selling individual unwrapped hard candies to enjoy while watching the game. Still dont understand this one…

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Other than the boredom and bleacher style seating, the game was a “Nail Bitting Finish” as the scoreboard so graciously told me for the last hour and a half of the match. To be fair, I compiled a list of all the things I enjoy about the game:

  1. The “Erection In Progress” signs where the subway construction was happening.
  2. Cameron White. We spent the majority of the game rating the scoreboard photos of the players. This Aussie took the cake.
  3. Flipping off the guys in front of us as that not so subtly took selfies of themselves with us in the background.
  4. My tangy paneer frankie (indian burrito) and masala popcorn.
  5. Asking and receiving free stuff–Sunrisers bucket hat and Indian flag THANKS.
  6. All the highfives we got when good things happened. Thanks Shiva for hand sanitizer!
  7. Being interviewed on live TV on our views of the match and only being able to comment on Cameron White’s good looks and the funny “Strategic Time Outs”.
  8. All the selfies we took when the police officers weren’t looking.

The Sunrisers won with two six point runs when they only had ten balls to get ten runs. Not sure what that means, but good for them. Overall an enjoyable evening, but not anything I ever need to experience again. Today we are going to scour the city for jerseys and celebrate our last night out in HYD at Cuba Libre for SALSA dancing!

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One comment on “Cricket Chaos

  1. Deborah Floyd
    April 21, 2013

    What?! Nothing to buy!? What is the point?! Thank Shiva you still left with some “goodies”! That’s my girl!

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This entry was posted on April 20, 2013 by .
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